The Ghosts (nice ones!) of Christmas Past .......... and Christmas Future.

As a child and young adult, I've always loved Christmas. I loved the excitement as a child. The magic. The waiting for Santa to come! I remember the last year that I believed. Well, the last year that I pretended to believe that is! I reckoned if I curled my legs up as I lay sleeping, Santa might think I was younger and leave me more pressies! You see I wasn't fully convinced either way of Santa's existence, so I was taking no chances!

As I grew older and became a working adult I still loved all things Christmassy. I loved Christmas shopping    ( that was then...NOT now!!) going out for Christmas drinks and parties with friends. What I really loved on Christmas morning was when my dad, brother and I would set off on foot (we didn't always have a car in our house) to visit our nearby relatives. We'd call to both our Grannies and maybe 1 or 2 aunt's houses as they all lived fairly close by. I really loved meeting up with all our cousins, we've a large extended family, and this was usually the only time we'd get to meet up.

We'd then trot off home, where my mam (if she hadn't joined us on our visiting trek) would have our lovely Christmas dinner ready for us. Of course, what I didn't fully appreciate at the time was that my dad had an ulterior motive on these Christmas Day visits. Alcohol. He'd have at least two drinks at every house.

As I grew older still, I loved the new traditions added to the mix. In particular I LOVED going to my local pub on Christmas Eve. The place would be  packed to the rafters and I'd get to catch up with friends I hadn't seen all year ....... particularly those who had emigrated to find work. A few of my friends would stop by our house on the way home and my wonderful mother would sacrifice some of the Christmas Day ham which she had just cooked. There is nothing like hot "real" ham sandwiches after a couple of drinkies!! Mmmmm...... I can taste them right now....seriously yummy!

It's only now, when I'm all "growed up", married and have a child of my own that I realise the stress my mam was under! I now realise why both my mam and my Granny always said they hated Christmas!

I now find myself saying the same thing every year! But that's a shame. And it isn't really technically true. I mean, I DO love Christmas. Honest, I do! I love the tree and the Christmas decorations. I love the presents wrapped under the tree..... I just don't like the shopping for and wrapping of them!! I love the Christmas dinner and I don't even mind cooking it, even though I'm not the best cook in the world!

I just hate all the stress involved .... and the running around, doing everyones Christmas shopping etc ..... all the madness for just one day!

But, I can cope with all that really. What I think I find most stressful is the "where are you spending Christmas Day?" question. Over the last few years that's been a major problem and at this stage I just say "Dunno". Or ignore it completely. Or, better still get Mr Jazzy to deal with it!

Of course most families experience this and I know most of you definitely have, as it's not easy spending Christmas Day in someone else's house when you have an Autistic child (that's if your child can tolerate the Christmas celebrations in the first place.) We had the visiting problem when WiiBoy was younger. The main problem was that he wouldn't eat which would make the tantrums even worse.

However, the main problem  now is actually my mam! That sounds truly awful, I know. She's given us wonderful Christmas memories and I want to do the same for WiiBoy.

Let me explain though, before you think that I am truly the most awful person ever!

My mother has Bi Polar Disorder and Dementia. This condition hits her ( and us ) regularly and hits like the Roller coaster ride I talked about here. In that post I described how she can (on occasion)  chose to be unwell, I also referred to previous horrendous situations and dealing with the HSE. One of these situations occurred about 5 years ago.

We decided to have Christmas Day with my mam, my brother and his then girlfriend in my mam's house. My mam had been  temporarily released from St Ita's Psychiatric Hospital for Christmas. Unfortunately it soon became apparent that this was a very ill-advised decision. Christmas Day was spent running up the stairs trying to get her to come down and eat and to stop tearing things into little pieces (a lot of old family photos were ruined that day.) I would then come back down ( while my brother took over upstairs) and deal with WiiBoy who was having his own Autistic moments. The funny thing was I was actually saying similar things to both of them!! To cut a long story short we tried to get her back to hospital that evening, but as she wouldn't get into the car we called an ambulance. She refused to go so the Ambulance guy said "sorry missus...nuthin' we can do as she's refusing to come with us" and they left!!. Seriously... that's what happened!! If you break your leg .... or are lying unconscious in the gutter they'll get you to hospital. But, mental illness?? Pfft .... you are on your own. My brother eventually got her back 3/4 days later (seriously dehydrated) by slipping a Valium into her tea.

Anyway, as you can see that was a very difficult Christmas and I swore I'd never put her, or us through that again. My mam is in a nursing home since then and I only take her home on the day if she's well enough. For all our sakes. That decision can only be made on the day though so we have to stick around. That's why I hate other family members putting us under pressure to decide where we're spending Christmas!

But here's the thing ......... why is it wrong to want to spend Christmas Day in your own house??? 

Why the pressure to go somewhere else???

I mean, once you have a child (or children) have you not got your own family? Do you not then begin to create your own family traditions and memories for when your children are older??

None of my childhood memories are of eating in any house other than my own so I want WiiBoys to be the same. I don't want his memories to be of being dragged from pillar to post on Christmas Day. Let's face it, like most children he prefers to be home with his Santa toys and like most Autistic children, he eats and behaves better when he's at home.We can visit Christmas Eve or St Stephens' Day . Why does everyone have to be visited on Christmas Day??

We have very few Santa years left, if any, with WiiBoy as he's already questioning his existence. Well, he questions it one minute and then the next minute he asks how Santa will find the Christmas tree as we have it in the new extension this year and the chimney is in the sitting room! However, he has solved the problem. He's going to make signs ..... "Tree this way Santa" and put them up!! Ahh.....bless!

 So, we're making our own family traditions starting with our first real Christmas tree in years!!

You have no idea how much I love this tree!

........This picture of last year in our unfinished house might give you some idea though!







Of course the best thing about this year's tree is that it was chosen and purchased by Mr Jazzy and WiiBoy! The only Christmas job I have not done. Now, that's a tradition I'm definitely going to retain!

We are having Christmas dinner at home and WiiBoy has even asked to try turkey this year!! My brother and his wife are coming  (they've no children) and my mam too. If she's well enough. The rollercoaster named The Bi Polar Express commenced it's ride yesterday so who knows whether or not she'll be well enough by next week. The trigger this time, unfortunately, was the  Nursing Home's annual Christmas party for patients and their families. It was held, as usual at 2pm! WiiBoy finishes school at 2.30pm so I can never go (no family nearby to help out). Have to say, even though I explained to her AND the staff, why I couldn't go I was put on a bit of a guilt trip by their comments. What can I do?? I can only make so many bits of myself.

Maybe it's not the stress of Christmas that I dislike. Maybe it's the guilt trips.

Or maybe it's both.

I have finally come to realise that the answer lies in acceptance.

Accept  the decision we make to have Christmas at home and advise others politely of our decision and leave it at that.

Accept that  mam will come if she's well enough.

Accept that I have no control over her mental well-being.

Whatever happens, I am creating a nice Christmas Day and nice family traditions for us .... come what may!! Then we will nice and calmly, visit Mr Jazzys' family in the Wicklow hills on St Stephens' Day where WiiBoy can get to meet with his cousins, aunts and uncles!

Whatever way you and your family  do (or do not) celebrate Christmas Day, I hope that December 25th  is all that YOU want it to be for YOUR family.

xx Jazzy.

P.S. Oh, by the way, WiiBoy wants to post the above Christmas tree photo and say a few words over on his blog. I've no idea what he wants to say, so ..... stay tuned!

Onwards and Upwards.

Well, another Hat of mine has had a polishing and a recent airing ....... again.
The Proud Mummy Hat!

Last week we had the much awaited Parent/Teacher Meeting. I no longer dread these meetings so I attended this one in a fairly positive, albeit a tad nervous, mode. (Note: His IEP will take place soon)

I was told that Wiiboy is doing very well academically and socially.

His spellings are going really well. At last year's P.T. meeting the decision was taken to reduce spellings to help him cope! No need for such measures this year.

He's very good at maths (no surprises there then!) but the wordy problems still pose difficulties for him. We are dealing with that issue so, no real worries there.

He's excellent at Art ..... again not surprised at that.

He also shows a great interest in and knowledge of History, Geography and Science. He really enjoys those subjects and seems to absorb the subject matter like a sponge! It's his penmanship that
is holding him back. That's where the laptop will ultimately help although they're having difficulty in incorporating it in the classroom. It's a distracting magnet for the rest of the class, you see!

Teacher told me how impressed they were when WiiBoy had to role play the part of a Viking King and was in the Hot Seat. The class had to ask him questions and he answered, in character, using the knowledge they'd gained from their recently completed class project. He showed great debating skills. Now, that DEFINITELY doesn't surprise me in the least! Sure, he practises those skills every day at home .... he could debate for Ireland, so he could! 

We discussed Gaelic and how we might use that time more appropriately as he finds it difficult. You see, "no-one passes the ball to me....and they're all Glory Hunters, mum". So I'm told ..... and teacher agrees that that's a fair assessment of the situation! However she's noticed that WiiBoy has made a new like-minded friend at Gaelic time and she doesn't want to remove that social contact. They're both very funny....and cute as foxes."What are you two doing?" asks teacher as she sees them swinging out of a pole whilst everyone else is tearing up and down the pitch. "Ermm....... defending!!" comes the sharp and very appropriate response!!


He's still inclined to get very upset when things go against him in class and Teacher is trying to be firm but not too harsh on him. He's also happy to sit back and let the others (the girls usually!) help him find things!! However, his "off days" are few and far between.

In fact she said ....sometimes I forget he's Autistic!

Now, while that is most definitely a double-edged sword, isn't it fantastic??! I mean, that's exactly what we've been working towards since we got his Diagnosis at age 4, six years ago. Inclusion in mainstream education to the extent that you wouldn't know that there's a problem. The people who need to know about the Autism do and he has help and support to continue his journey. (We just need to HSE to get their act together and step up to the plate) He knows "things are hard" for him but he also knows how to cope better. Like I've said before, his Autism is like the IRA ....it hasn't gone away you know, but it has reduced to this extent. His Autism is an integral part of him and makes him think and process things the way he does, it makes him.....him. And I wouldn't change that part of him for the world. However I do want him to function in mainstream education and society as much as any one else can. I reckon we're getting there.... if we haven't already arrived!

The way he thinks and processes things will also influence his future career choices, as will his obsessions, so his Autism is very important. In fact, his Autism is becoming more enabling, rather than disabling. I reckon.

Today he told me what job he'd like when he grows up. This week it's to work in a Game shop. Obviously the games are an attraction but so too is the uniform ....he noticed that they wear comfortable T Shirts....just like Favourite Uniforms! Thinking of my previous post and this boy,  I suggested that maybe he should work where they invent the games ..... at Nintendo itself perhaps! He was very interested in that suggestion.

Five minutes later whilst watching the windscreen wipers on the car, he said he was going to invent something to help "when there's ice on the window". He would have hot water instead of cold!! We didn't get into the finer points of how he'd heat the water!

The possibilities are endless, it would seem!

Oh, did I tell you that Teacher also said that he's a great addition to the class??!!

Oh my...my head has swollen so much I may have to get myself a bigger Peacock hat!!


From my perspective I see WiiBoy constantly learning from his peers. His vocabulary has increased immensely. He's using much bigger words and adjectives etc. He uses the word "literally" (pronounced "litery"!) a lot, for example. Even the way he structures his sentences is learned from integrating with his peers.

Recently himself and his best friend discussed their Dear Santa letters. They're both asking for XBox 360 elite ( like we need another electronic device in the house!) but WiiBoy specified all the bits he wanted with it....like 2 controllers etc. His friend told him that was being greedy. So, he thought about it and he rewrote the letter asking for less! He wasn't really being greedy because the extras come with it anyway...I didn't tell him that because I thought it was a good lesson for him.

And finally.......yesterday as I was writing out his party invitations for the 22nd December I realised that for the first time he is inviting every boy in his class as he is now friends with them all!! Also, his party is a Bowling party! It was only 3 years ago that we had to refuse an invite to a Bowling party as I knew it would upset him too much.

You know ....... at this stage I don't think they make a Peacock Hat big enough to fit me !! xx Jazzy

Up Here For Dancing .... and All That Jazz(y)!

Well, the last few weeks have been a mad flurry of activity as we get Panto 2010 firmly on track. The choreographer's hat has been found, battered and worn in the bottom of the wardrobe ( or, was it the Green bin??!) It's been spruced up and plonked firmly, if slightly askew atop my head. It has now become part of my daily hat juggling routine as it exchanges places, with speedy regularity with all my other  millinery ware. Like the School Run Hat, The Shopping Hat, Housework Hat, Taxi mum Hat, Visiting Mam Hat, Good Little Wifey Hat etc; etc!!

It's very handy actually, 'cos when I get bored with jobs that I hate I just swap hats! And when driving from one place to another, or having done taxi-mum for WiiBoy I just put the Choreographer's Hat on while I'm waiting and get some (fun)  work done!! I'm sure I look quite a sight sitting in the car, or poolside at swimming lessons with notebook in hand, earphones in ears and feet tap-tapping away! It must look even funnier when a few hand movements are thrown in for good measure!


A lot of work goes into getting this production on stage, for the last two weekends in January, and an awful lot of people put in an awful lot of work into making it happen. And every one of us does it whilst trying to squeeze it in with our busy lives.This post just reflects my involvement, but I most definitely am not alone. There's also our very talented and supportive Director and Musical Director ........ among others.

And besides,  it's fun!

We've auditioned ALL the adults and children, we've cast the show, chosen the songs and we're up and running! Our wonderful Wardrobe Department are working away on the costumes and sets and props are being sourced/made. It is quite literally "all hands on deck"!!

I have about 100+ silly amount of children......... I refuse to add them up because if I do ....... if I actually see the total number, I might quite literally, throw my fabulous hat at it and run for the hills!

I've pretty much got a handle on all 8 children's numbers that I have (at least, I think it's 8...again, I refuse to count them!!) and they're coming together slowly (verrry slowly) but surely. I think! I LOVE the music I have and I'm really enjoying it. I'm hoping I interpret it properly. Of course, I also have adult Solo/Duet numbers to move but I'll get to them ....eventually. Yikes!!

But, it's not just your feet you need for dancing. Oh, no. That would be too easy! The mind boggling, head-doing-in-stuff that's also required would definitely ...... well........ do your head in! Seriously.

But it's FUN!!

When you audition 100+silly amount of children, refusing NONE of them, you then have to find enough dance routines to incorporate them all. Then you have decide which age group suits each song .... trying to to keep classes together. Which isn't always possible. Then you have to find rehearsal slots for them all, that hopefully doesn't clash with THEIR busy lives. And they really do have busy lives. That they tell you about. All the time. Like, last Saturday when one child couldn't attend because "he had something else to do"!! The inference being, of course, that I had nothing better to do!! The innocence of youth....ehh? Sure, what else could I do but laugh!! Or..do my Christmas shopping instead.....or my grocery shopping......erm...... paint my nails....pick my..., well... you get the picture!!

So a lot of my time is spent on dancing, of course. When WiiBoy's in school, I've been doing on average, one hour every day getting steps together and frantically swapping my fabulous Hats to get other necessary jobs done! At the moment I've worked myself up to about 9 hours a week teaching the children and am about to add some lunchtime sessions. Then of course I have to add the adults in to the mix. A lot of time also goes into the admin side.....meetings, note taking, getting rehearsal notes out, planning and organising. Then there's the unexpected change of plans and it's back to the drawing board!

All this planning has re-united me with a system I'd foolishly discarded in recent times, as I didn't have time for it. And that system is a very simplistic To-Do List! Oh boy, but it's magic! It is so empowering. I mean if it's written down, then it gets done...if not the first day then the 2nd day will do. And there's nothing like the feeling of "check" .... another job off the list!
 
I've sailed through the first two weeks. It was hard work and I was exhausted at the end of it, but exhilarated too. With the exhaustion came a strange kind of energy and a sense of being. Of being me. And that made me think ..........

No matter what our "job" is in life we can all benefit from doing something that makes us ... "us". If we can manage it at all. For some it's simply timeout, or working outside the home works for others. For me dancing was such an important part of my life, for most of my life. I danced in shows, back-to-back for at least 15 years before I even met Mr Jazzy. So, while Mr Jazzy may not "get" why I do the Panto every year, he did marry a dancer!  It is an integral part of me. Yes, it is hard to fit it all in but it's gotten easier over the years ( this is my 7th year as Choreographer) as WiiBoy has made his transition to Mainstream, he's now happy to be involved in the panto. He even shares his Dance ideas with me!!
 

And besides, I intend to keep dancing until my legs fall off. here's a picture of me
in 20 or so years time................................ The Dancing Granny!!

So, the first two weeks went well but then there was a major change of plans this week. WiiBoy, having had the Swine Flu jab and avoiding getting all the debilitating flu bugs going around his school, decides to come down with ...... Chicken Pox! Yup.... Chicken Pox. Like I've said before, they're dropping like flies in his class. Seven were out on Monday last....but none of them with Chicken Pox!! He's a trail blazer is WiiBoy!!

Luckily enough he's not too sick with them, it's just that with Mr Jazzy working late I've been housebound since last Tuesday. I've had to cancel and re-arrange rehearsals which involved sending inordinate amounts of texts and getting notes to the school. Another two days should do it with WiiBoy but it's knocked a dent in my schedule and made me panic a little! But all will be well. And I have to remind myself .... doing panto every year is NOT why I'm on a career Break ;))

So, the wheels of  Panto 2010 are definitely in motion. There is no going back and no saying " I don't wanna play anymore" when things get tough! But, we're a great team and we have each others' backs. I also have the help of some great people.... my good friend N, two mums and a first year student who are a fantastic help at rehearsals!

I'll get going now...... I have more steps to sort for tomorrow and To-Do-Lists to make! And a DVD to make.

"Jazzy's Guide to Fitness and (Brain) Training" will in all good music stores by Christmas!!

Says she with tongue firmly planted in cheek......... and Choreographers Hat even more askew!!

Good Luck!! xx Jazzy

The State of us .......... a Nation Dividing

Ireland Inc is in trouble ...... very, very big trouble. No-one doubts that very difficult and unpalatable decisions have to be made in the very near future but I believe some serious questions need asking. And answering.

Our present Government is hell bent on a particular route to get us back on track and I have serious doubts about the route that they've chosen. The decisions they are making and the information they are drip feeding us are pitting different sectors of our nation against each other in these very difficult times. An ulterior motive is definitely at play here and they are in danger of creating a multi-layered society.

They should be careful what they wish for.

We are a nation dividing ..... bit by bit every week.

Let us take a look at this.

There's the Public vs Private Sector divide, the biggest divide in my opinion. I've no doubt that what I'm going to say next will alienate me but say it I must. This divide was created by and is being nurtured by this Government. Today's strike by the nation's Public Servants will unfortunately serve to deepen the divide but as the Government won't even engage in discussion we have no choice. Earlier this year they railroaded in the Pension Levy with no discussion. A further decrease in wages is simply a step too far. Most people on the Picket Line with Mr Jazzy this morning earn €30,000p.a. or less.


I first discussed this issue, among others in my post on the Mc Carthy Report. I find all my points raised still relevant and I completely stand over them.

We can talk until the cows come home about wages and conditions in both sectors and get nowhere because sometimes the situations aren't really that comparable. The recently released CSO figures detailing how well the Public Sector are paid and how we got a 3% pay increase in the 12 month period to June 2009 are grossly incorrect, as even our Taoiseach Mr Brian Cowen acknowledged here. We got no such increase. A pay increase of 2.5% was due to us but was reneged upon. The total reduction in our case was 15.4% ........ this includes Pension Levy of 8.3%, income levy increased PRSI contributions and pay agreements not honoured. The Pension Levy is a Pay Cut and NOT a pension contribution as it applies on all income (incl overtime etc). The Income Levy and increased PRSI contributions were, of course, inflicted upon all workers.

On the other hand a lot of Private Sector workers have lost their jobs and a lot of others have taken huge reductions in their wages ...25% or 30% in some cases and that is shocking. Irish workers are the hardest hit with 61% of employers laying off staff. But remember, like I've previously said, not everyone in the Private Sector has taken a cut, as of my last Post on this issue (see link above) only 9% have taken a reduction .......

As has been pointed out to me recently by two business friends ( both Directors of their companies) Ireland Inc has a budgeting problem and has to cut it's cloth to suit it's measure, just like they have to do.  That is very true and I know we have to consider the huge borrowing costs in order to pay our Public Servants. Now, I didn't engage in this discussion with these two friends. I didn't ask how borrowing to pay Public Servants was any different from the suggestion recently made that the Government should pay employers to keep people in their jobs. For example. There was no point really because in one breath they were discussing how my Husband's wages should be further reduced and in the next breath talking about an upcoming family holiday to Florida in  one case and a shopping trip in the other! We are on two different planets methinks!!

The borrowing costs of this nation of ours is, of course, a very big problem that needs addressing. We also have to consider the fact that 35% of the Governments spending is on Public Sector pay.

As unpopular as this will sound the biggest difference between Public and Private jobs , in my opinion, is supply and demand. In a Recession some services will no longer be sought after as people have less and less money in their pockets. We go out to restaurants less, we use public transport/drive as opposed to using taxis, more nights in, less mini- breaks etc etc.


But, we ALWAYS need Public Services. Health services, Emergency Services, Police Services and Teachers are necessary. Taxes have to and must be collected, Social Welfare payments need assessing and paying etc; etc. You see the "good secure job" is "secure" because it's always in demand. We must be careful about why people are demanding reduced Public Sector pay. If it's because we are deemed to be too highly paid then that's one thing, and that issue can be discussed and debated.

Also, Public Service Departments are not, by their very nature, profit-making enterprises. They're not even self-financing. Another reason you can't really make a proper comparison.

It's not all doom and gloom though. There are actually a few companies making a top-line profit this year: Ryanair, Aer Lingus (yes..Aer Lingus!) Tesco and  Vodafone for example. In fact Vodafone employees received an early Christmas bonus this year..... they each got a new phone! And fair play ..... I'm happy for them.

We must be very careful here, if we cap salaries and reduce wages too much in specific sectors how can we be competitive when things improve globally?? Pay peanuts..... you get monkeys.

We do, of course need to make reforms in  the Public Service as I also discussed in my Mc Carthy Report post. But if the reduction of employees is a factor in these reforms we need to consider what quality we want in how our Public Services are delivered. Less employees means backlogs and huge delays..... (remember, it's the employees that are being reduced and NOT the demand for the services.) Just like in the 1980's and 1990's when we, in Revenue, had hundreds and hundreds of unworked items for months on end. Overtime couldn't even put a dent in it, it was that bad. As we speak there are delays...in Education and HSE....that you will have noticed in receiving payments of Home Tuition etc, etc. Recently I experienced HUGE delays in getting a human to answer the phone in Child Benefit Section. There has to be a better way to do things. Reform is necessary but a blanket reduction of numbers will only make things worse. And so will the brain drain that's presently occurring in all Departments as early Retirement and Income Tax decisions kick in. For example, at present 40% of Gardai have less than 5 years service which just shows how much experienced staff have been encouraged to leave. There's also a huge Brain Drain in Revenue Commissioners Department. This will have a massive negative effect on the delivery of Public Services, probably for years to come.


Be careful what you wish for......


There is even a divide within the Public Service ........ between Frontline Staff and Administrative staff. As a result of Government rumblings and threats the emergency services have banded together and formed their own group to highlight their issues, which are specific to them. Now, I don't blame them for this but they are specifically separating themselves from their "colleagues in the administrative side". These Emergency staff are highly trained, they do an incredible and difficult job and work very unsociable hours. But, for every job anyone of them do there are administrative staff required to document and collate reports /files etc. This was very evident on our recent trip to Tallaght Hospital to get WiiBoy his Swine Flu vaccination. It was very well set up, I thought. There were 2 staff greeting and handing out the forms. Another Staff member ushering people to the correct seating areas. There were 4 or 5 nurses and at about 8/10 administrative staff set up on laptops to process the forms and issue patient numbers. This set up ensured a prompt and smooth delivery of this particular service although these staff members had to come from somewhere so no doubt a backlog of work has been created elsewhere in the hospital. However, this scenario does highlight how essential the administrative staff were to the Emergency nursing staff in assisting them in the smooth delivery of their service.

Those of us who are currently in employment, be it Private or Public Sector are considered lucky. And we are. But further reducing salaries reduces our spending power. Consumers are considered to be the engine of our economy. If we don't spend then more jobs will be lost.

Here's the science bit.........

As of June 2009 there are 370,000 Public Servants in employment which makes the State a very large employer. A very large proportion of these employees, 45%, earn less than €40,000 pa. If you reduce their spending power by a further 7%, as is being proposed, then spending habits will be restricted to basic requirements and more Private Sector jobs will be lost. Also, by further reducing salaries in both sectors this Government is in serious danger of creating a new phenomena....... The Working Poor. Although, maybe this is not so new ....... it will, however become more prominent. There is nothing to be gained by reducing salaries to the extent that people are on the breadline.

This brings me to the next divide in our society ......... The Employed vs The Unemployed divide. Like I said in my Mc Carthy Report post, I am very uncomfortable discussing this. The points I raised are still very valid though. How long before there's not much difference between working or being on the dole?? Remember that report I mentioned where a man on full benefits had the equivalent of a €55,000 salary?? Link that to that salary of a large percentage of Public and Private Sector employees. Why bother going out to work??? (This comment must be considered in conjunction with all that I've written in that previous post)

Should Social Welfare be reduced? Probably, as wages have reduced. There needs to be an equilibrium between wages and Social Welfare and we do have to take into consideration that 36% of Government Spending is on Social Welfare. But we must be very careful not to make the most vulnerable in our society bear the brunt of this mess.Cuts are also being considered across the board in Social Welfare. I am seriously concerned with how the Government intend to impose these cuts. If they tier them, as they intend doing with Child Benefit, then they will only create further divisions in our society.


Nurturing this divide will not encourage people going back to the workforce when the economy turns around. It will only encourage employment in the Black Market. Did you know that, as reported in last weeks Sunday Tribune the Black Market currently costs the economy €461million per week??? This will get worse and must be addressed. I also refer to my point about Family Income Supplement raised in my previous post on this.

I addressed this whole area in that McCarthy post so I re-iterate ..... please consider that post in conjunction with what I'm saying here!!

Then there's the Rich vs the The Rest of us.......... what worries me the most here is the definition of "Rich" when it comes to the Government deciding how they implement an extra "Rich" tax or means test an allowance. Rich usually means middle Income, as that catches the majority of us and raises the most taxes etc. That, in turn can feed into Employed vs Unemployed divide.

Another divide that is now in danger of deepening is the Working Outside the Home vs Stay-at-Home- Mum. Of course it's not always the mum that's the Stay at Home parent but I'll generalise for the purpose of this post. In 1999 this Government introduced Individualisation into our Tax system in order to address the concerns of families where both parents were working, They didn't feel that it was worth their while working, which is understandable as one spouse (usually the husband) got most of the Tax Free Allowances. It also helped with the big problem facing the Government at the time ......... a glut of jobs on the market. And no-one to fill them. More CSO figures released recently states that 300,000 women entered the workforce between 1998 and 2007. The reason for this, in a word, is INDIVIDUALISATION! I've ALWAYS said that and now this report backs me up.

Individualisation may have appeased double income families but it was only cosmetic really....Tax Free Allowances can be divided equally you know! (Of course they've since been replaced with Tax Credits) However, it was the tinkering with the Taxation Bands that really penalised the Stay-at-Home-Mum/Parent. In the ten years since this system was introduced they only increased the Homemaker Tax Credit ONCE, whilst other Credits got regular makeovers.

The reason I say that this Government is widening this divide is because a large proportion of those extra 300,000 women in the workforce are probably losing, or in danger of losing their jobs. And, while their income is dramatically reduced, if they're on Social Welfare they can still avail of Individualisation. Having spoken to some, whilst naturally shocked and worried about the loss of their jobs they realised another benefit ....being at home with their children. Especially during the summer months.

We need to have a Tax system that's fair to all and considers the contribution made to the economy, to family life, to local communities and to the very fabric of our society by all parents whether they work inside or outside the home. And every parent deserves the right to choose whether or not they work (solely) inside or outside the home.... but that choice must be based on viable options.

Individualisation can also skew the definition of "Rich" as mentioned above ........... a salary of say, €100,000 to a Single Income family  is sooo not the same as it is to a Double Income family! It is NOT comparing like with like..... because of Individualisation, two salaries of €50,000 does NOT EQUAL one salary of €100,000.

The final divide I'll mention (I'm sure there are more!) is Bankers/Developers vs Homeowners. This is such a huge divide I'm not going to get caught up in it. Suffice it to say ; Where the Hell is the NAMA for the rest of us???

Where's the NAMA for those people soon to lose their homes because they can't pay their mortgages???
Where's the NAMA for those who have lost their jobs and are struggling???
Where's the NAMA for those who have suffered reductions in salaries???
Where's the NAMA to get the engine of our economy (i.e. the consumers) spending again??? They've another name for this in the USA and Australia....... I believe it's called a Stimulis Package!! Doubt if we'll ever see one here though!

The biggest concern of course is that they'll squander the Taxpayers money and that they'll release all properties for sale at once. Also, as it has now been legally signed up by President Mc Aleese, any incoming Government will have to adhere to it. There is now no going back. We're stuck with it.

There's no doubt that there are more tough times ahead. These decisions have to be carefully made and considerations given to how they affect everyone whilst trying to avoid causing, or deepening divisions in our society. We all need to contribute to help us get out of this mess but it must be done fairly and equitably across all sectors. And it needs to be done in a way that gives people spending power and protects and creates employment.

And, this Government needs to be ...............

careful what they wish for, 'cos they just might get ......... more than they bargained for.

Take care.............. Jazzy xx

My Student of the Week

Last Monday was back to school after the midterm break, amid some trepidation on my part. It took the whole previous term for things to bed down for WiiBoy and to be honest I don't think we'd completely settled. Some things were good, really good, but homework is still a problem. He's exhausted by the end of the week and not able for his extra-curricular activities by Thursday/ Friday.  So, while I was looking forward to having my mornings back I wasn't really looking forward to the after school job!!

However, despite a bad start on the first day back, I needn't have worried! Because, by the end of the week he was called up on stage at Assembly ( along with the successful students from all classes)  to receive the above certificate! Student of the Week. Awarded to him for his excellent work this week and  great attitude in class. What a wonderful start to the new term .... long may it continue.

The "bad start" involved  a written essay consisting of 200 words, a story plan and a miscommunication between teacher - WiiBoy - myself. What a horrible piece of homework for first day back!

I knew Teacher had spent time with him alone detailing what he had to do, as his  SNA Angel was out for two days.

But there were no visuals and no written bullet points to assist us.

I have requested this but it's only at the planning stages between Resource Teacher and I.

However, we weathered the mini-meltdown and got what we could done. I explained to teacher and got a very informative note back in the Communication Diary the following day. You see, she agrees with me that WiiBoy has a fabulous imagination and she would love this to come across in bodies of work like essays. If he could just get past his frustrations ....... and stop counting every damn word!! You know it's gonna be a long session when you hear the wailing....... "Waaahh ..... I've got 3 words done muum .....Waaahhh ..... I've 197 to go ....... Waahhh"!!

Oh, dear God ..... give me patience!!

The miscommunication thing is a big issue too so I was given the 4 page Teaching Aide for essay writing and it was very interesting. In more ways than one. Two of the pages were neat bullet-points and the other two were a kind of Mind Map version..... you know little boxes/bubbles coming from the centre piece (topic heading) with a synopsis of the requirements. The latter two pages were the ones that made more sense to me. Guess I'm a visual learner too!

Mind Maps are the way to go. Mind Maps For Kids by Tony Buzan. is being used in school for WiiBoy and I am going to buy a copy for home too. His Resource Teacher fully recommends it and even uses it for her own Leaving Cert son!! I think it will also help organise this very disorganised head of mine!

The SNA Angel sent home a kind of cover-all-situations Guide, devised by her good self to help him approach the less structured homework entitled "The Seven Steps to Problem Solving"

Wonderful idea but I think it might be just a little too advanced for now. It's ultimately what he'll need to work from though so I'll keep it safe until we're ready!

I had another chat with his fabulous Resource Teacher (Ms B) and she's come up with a great idea. Flash cards! Simple and effective. She has devised some already and they will be held in a little pouch. These are also designed to cover all situations. The idea is:

•  Teacher gives verbal instruction to whole class.
• SNA will sit with WiiBoy bullet pointing her instructions.
• WiiBoy will choose a flash card that suits each of the bullet points so he has a written AND visual support for completing the set piece of homework!
• Over time SNA will pull back and WiiBoy gets to organise himself.

 Ms B. has already introduced this method to him and he's loving it! Like everything else new that she introduces to him he asks her to "give me an example" and then he's away! Hopefully it will be put into practise soon.

We were so proud of him last week. These certificates, although few and far between, are wonderful for the children's self esteem.

Actually they're currently receiving some kind of weekly class on self esteem and he seems to like it. It seems to be working too. Just yesterday when I complimented him on his abilities with maths division he told me it was easy and that he was "brilliant at multiplication too"!! He also did some brilliant maths homework this evening. I thought they were rather difficult. I didn't recognise the format in which they were presented but he knew what to do and just got on with it. He even helped his friend to do them!

Now THAT, believe me, is a FIRST.

Onwards and upwards for this new term I say!

Go WiiBoy ........ you're the best!

xx Jazzy

Jazzy's go 'Pooleside.....at Anfield!

The Jazzy's are just back from our "Surprise!!" trip to Liverpool to see Liverpool vs Manchester United Premier League Soccer match, for Mr Jazzy's 50th Birthday.

The "Surprise!!" was revealed to Mr Jazzy 10 days before we travelled. In fact we told him about it the night we went to see the Ireland vs Montenegro International match. Least said about that one the better....was like watching paint dry! Suffice it to say, the highlight of the match (in WiiBoy and I's humble opinion) was when the crowd decided to entertain themselves by doing the Mexican Wave (WiiBoy called it the Tidal Wave!!)........ 7 times in a row!! We know this because we counted , we were sooo bored!


I first talked about this secret "Surprise!!" here and was looking forward to sharing the revelation with you all, but unfortunately all did not go according to plan. My "Travel Agent" , AKA Tout In Suit, was playing hard to get and there were some worrying moments. I cancelled my booking ..... he threatened that he'd force me to pay anyway...... I accused him of breach of contract..... and sent him an email that I meant to save as a draft! Oh God...how I screamed at the computer that day!! "Nooo...Nooo", I wailed as I frantically and hopelessly clawed at the computer in a ridiculous attempt to retrieve the offending email! That was the day I had awful trouble with Wiiboy doing his homework and he told Teacher next day that he'd sue her ..... now you know where he got that from!! On a scale of 1 to 10 how stressful do you think that day was ??? Put it this way........ if you'd peeked in my kitchen window you'd have seen me drinking an inch of Brandy at 5.15 in the evening! Note: I HATE Brandy and NEVER drink like that. Medicinal purposes only .... I actually thought I'd have a heart attack or something that day! Ridiculous!

Anyway, all worked out in the end and we went ahead with the trip.

We left on the Saturday in a Nurefen/Calpol/Vicks haze! Wiiboy, on receiving his school holidays the day before, chose then to be sick! This is despite the fact that the kids had been dropping like flies in school the whole term long......typical! I was up steaming the bathroom in the early hours of Saturday morning and in the early hours of Sunday morning in Liverpool, I was up with him again for 2 hours trying to get his temperature down. Admittedly he had me worried for a while but he was eventually ok. He wasn't quite himself for the whole trip, I just kept him topped up with Nurefen and Calpol every 4/5 hours. I even gave it to him during the match! He was fine and he did enjoy himself.

We flew into Manchester Airport with our National Airline, Aer Lingus , as it was much cheaper than flying Ryanair to Liverpool. You know, it's been about 3/4 years since we've flown Aer Lingus. They were a joy. No hassles ..... pre-assigned seats so no clambour for getting on board..... lots of help available when doing the automatic check-in of baggage. Now I mean proper help like ..... from real human beings ....in uniforms so that they're easily recognisable! Oh, and .....get this...... a courtesy bus to the aircraft!! Do you remember those things??? Oh, pure bliss. Oh, and no-one selling you crappy scratch cards on board ....or ridiculous fanfare music played when the flight arrives ahead of schedule! God I wish Aer Lingus had the Reus route on their schedule then I'd be "totally made up" (said in Scouse accent)!!!

We stayed in the Radisson SAS Hotel in Liverpool and it was very nice indeed! I wouldn't recommend it for our more "flighty" children though, as every room on each floor (we were on the 8th) opened out on to a balcony. If you looked over the balcony you could see right down to the reception area! I even found that quite scary! We were ideally located though for restaurants etc. We even happened across the Beatles old haunt "The Cavern" in the Matthews Street area on the first night! The whole area there was buzzing but we had to pass on it!


So, onto Sunday afternoon and The Match! The tickets we got were someone else's Season Tickets that they weren't using and they were for 3 males. Very expensive as everyone gets their cut ...... Season ticket holder, their Agent (AKA Tout) and of course, my Tout in Suit. No worries in getting in though as guys at the door were more interested in what was in my handbag (Nurefen ..... no beach balls, I swear!) than the photo on my ticket. Thank God for that! But I tell you, I won't be booking anymore "Surprise!!" trips through footballtrips.ie .... no matter how impressive looking their website is.

The stand was fairly empty when we arrived so we got a good look around ......

Man U. Coach and players warming up

Well, most of the Stands were empty. The Anfield Stand was full ...... of 3000 Man U supporters, let in before everyone else for segregation reasons. I'm new to all this so I'm telling this from a novice viewpoint. The Man U. supporters were in great singing form! They never stopped, from the minute they came in ... an hour before kick-off! I thought they were great. Ah, sure aren't they fantastic supporters, I thought to myself.

I copped on though, as things progressed. The Liverpool supporters ahem, "responses" to the chants ( or should that be taunts) were a dead giveaway! WiiBoy loved it.... he got right in there with the rude words ( one of the responses was "Sh1t".... oh he loved that!) We did try to stop him, eventually he agreed to stop saying it when everyone else did!! He understood the "middle finger" of course, but thankfully didn't get the "up-and-down hand movement!! If you know what I mean! Seriously though, I could see where the phrase "incitement to hatred" comes in.

It was like there were two shows going on ......... one on the Pitch, which was quite exciting and the other in the Stands which was, ahem .......interesting! There were plenty of stewards and Policemen about to keep order. Supporters were removed for excessive gestures, let alone words.

Here's Liverpool's no.12, Fabio Aurelio going for a corner shot (you can see the Man U. supporters to his left, they were very quiet at this point!) ...........


......... Although he had to clear away some beach balls first! Apparently the previous week they'd lost against Sunderland F.C. because the real ball deflected off a beach ball thrown onto the pitch! That's why they confiscated the beach balls brought in by Man U. supporters. Expecting this, the Liverpool supporters brought their own and threw them around the Anfield stand!! They had some very lewd comments written on them too.

Anyway, it was an exciting Match. The first goal scored by Liverpool brought the house down ( a show euphemism I know!). Immediately the British Bobbies were dispatched to cover the Liverpool Supporters! But it was nothing compared to the aftermath of the 2nd goal. Oh God, it was nailbiting. The referee gave 5 extra minutes injury time which was a joke. Even to a novice like me it was obvious he was giving extra time for Man U. to score. We were clock-watching ..... when we weren't nail biting and I swear it was actually 6 or 7 minutes before he blew the final whistle. Last laugh on the referee though ...... 'cos Liverpool only went and scored in the last minute!! WOOHOO!! 2:0 to Liverpool! Pity though they lost their previous matches and the two since we came home!! They should hire us as Lucky Mascots!

Oh, the excitement. Nothing like the atmosphere when the whole Stadium belted out the Liverpool FC anthem ........ "You'll never Walk Alone". Pure magic. By the way, that song is from the Musical "Carousel" which is the first musical show I ever did. I'm getting quite a few show references in here, aren't I!! While we were belting out the song Man U supporters were sitting stony faced and perfectly still. I've never seen anything like it ..... the place was erupting and they were perfectly still. Mad.

Mr Jazzy was a very, very happy man that day! The three of us were. It was great. Such an exciting match and I really got caught up in it. I still don't like football though!

We then began the long walk back through quite a dilapidated area, to get a taxi. We made the sensible decision, I believe to stop in a pub to let the crowds disperse a little. Unfortunately Mr British Bobby didn't agree and closed the pub, kicking us all out! For security reasons no doubt, the Man U. supporters were probably "leaving the building" and they didn't want any trouble. Very heavily policed are these football events and with every good reason, no doubt. Luckily enough time had elapsed and we got a taxi shortly after.


We went back to Anfield the next day to the Museum and Tour (of the Grounds). That was great, lots of old memorabilia and trophies etc ..........



We went backstage (I really can't help myself now!) and saw the dressing rooms with the team shirts all set out.





I was very surprised at how basic it all was. I mean these are professional footballers on serious money. However, they base themselves in Melwood Park beforehand and then transfer to the grounds.





This is the last thing the players see as they come through the "tunnel" and on to the pitch. Each player touches it reverently before they enter. Reminded me of our "rituals" when we were performing on say the Gaiety stage in Ireland. A very revered Theatre in Dublin, in our day.

Wiiboy in the "dugout" where the Mangers etc sit.

Mr Jazzy and Wiiboy in the Kop Stand.

This is a very old Stand and said to hold 28,000 officially (31,000 unofficially) when it was standing room only. It now seats 12,500 as all stands must be seated now. Much more comfortable ....... and safer too.

Our tour Guide told us that the stadium seats 45,000. That was before the previous day's match. It now seats 44,922 ....... the Man U. supporters tore the seats up and wrecked the toilets when they were leaving. Liverpool supporters don't do that when they're away....they put hard -to- remove stickers on the seats instead!! One's as bad as the other, methinks.

Liverpool FC will most likely proceed with building their new stadium in Stanley Park. They will tear down the old Stands, which are steeped in history but the pitch will remain. Why??? Because so many people have had their ashes spread on the pitch over the years it's considered sacred ground. They will turn it into a Garden of Remembrance.

So after all that excitement it's back to "normal" life. And a very busy life it is at the moment so apologies for gaps in posting and for not catching up on all your more worthy blogs. That's next on my list. For now though I better go publish this magical post..... so called because it keeps disappearing and re-appearing in a cloud of magic dust! I better publish before it disappears again!!
xx Jazzy

Just When You Thought it was Safe......

It' s been great posting recently about all the positive changes with WiiBoy. It really is good to take stock every so often and see the positive things. Sometimes the changes are so subtle and take place over such a long period of time, that we don't even realise that they've occurred. It is good to remind ourselves though ..... and pause a moment to take a well deserved pat on the back!!

Then there are the times that we, well I, kind of forget that things can still be hard for him. You know, when things have improved and you feel that your child is able to tolerate more so you push him/her just that little bit further. Which can sometimes mean a little too far. Like, when all is going well when you're out shopping, so you go into one more shop.... or you squeeze one extra quick job in while he/she's waiting for you to do something for them. Then the "A" word comes right back to bite you on the bum! The Autism may have substantially reduced but......it hasn't gone away you know (like Gerry Adams from Sinn Fein once famously, and disingenuously, remarked about the I.R.A.)!!
I constantly think about the Autistic Spectrum and how it affects WiiBoy and of course, go through my doubting periods. Now, I know he's on the spectrum but when things are really good other people's doubts enter my head. I think about them....then quickly brush them aside.

I had a great chat with a good friend of mine recently who has 4 boys. He was curious about Autism and how it presents. Most things I brought up he could see traits of in his own sons but accepted that it was the combination of traits in just one child that added up to a spectrum disorder. That said, it's good for me to hear that other children react similarly (but not exactly!) like WiiBoy.

The Autistic Spectrum is so wide and varied and just to confound things, it can also be covered with a veil of invisibility. Or, even with a cloak of "normalcy". If you know what I mean ....... and I know that you do. We're usually covered with the Cloak of Normalcy which, to be honest, is a very nice Cloak indeed and does it's job extremely well! We are very lucky to have worked our way up to wearing this Cloak.

I think we wear this cloak every where we go and usually no-one notices, which is great. Hey, sometimes I'm even fooled by this cloak! When I push WiiBoy too far I'll get tantrums and lots and lots of giving out. I'll get firm with him and then it all falls apart. On occasion he has said "But mum....you forget that it's still hard for me". Now, this line can be delivered in a number of ways. On a couple of occasions he really was upset and I knew I'd pushed too far. They were genuine tears and he was unable to cope in the situation. The Cloak of Normalcy had fallen off. So, I'd stop everything, sit down and talk it through with him. If it was a homework issue we might agree that he could do a bit more later on. Some may consider that "giving in" to him but I don't. I consider it being understanding and letting him know that his feelings are important. He knows that I will take his feelings seriously and that he will be listened to. He knows I understand that sometimes it is indeed harder for him. An important lesson for when he's older, I think.

However, WiiBoy is also capable of chancing his arm and saying "Don't they know I went to the Helping School??"! The usual response to that one is : "Yes, but you don't go there anymore because things are much easier for you now..."!!

So then, all is going relatively well now. There are huge positive changes and we can all kind of forget. We think it's safe to go back into the water and then the "A" word comes back searching for a bum to bite! Aha, says the "A" word....let me show you that I am still here!

Last week WiiBoy went to the Barbers with Mr Jazzy for a haircut. His Cloak of Normalcy was firmly in place and all went fabulously. What he didn't know was that his Resource Teacher was driving past at the time and happened to spot him in the Barbers.

On Monday he had a Resource session with this Teacher and Ms B. said; "Wow, what a great haircut". WiiBoy was happy with that. Then she said "I saw you in the Barbers getting it cut". Well, he was having none of this. No way could he accept that she had seen him. She couldn't possibly have seen him because he didn't see her . Nor could he let it go. He spent the whole session quizzing her, he'd do some work then ask her a question about it. Like, what colour top he had on, who was sitting beside him etc. It was a real eye-opener for Ms B, and me too. I mean, there was I happily believing we had Theory of Mind nailed!! ( if you're checking out this link see also the Sally-Anne Test.) See, the Cloak of Normalcy slipped again and the "A" word came-a-biting!

I learned of the above incident because I had a meeting with Ms B., resource incidents don't normally find their way into the Daily Journal. I will have to remedy that, pronto! By the way Ms B. was also his class Teacher 2 years ago and she also sees huge improvements!

I was glad I found out though because last night it happened again. When he left the classroom yesterday, to go to resource they were doing homework. They stopped then and did music while he was gone but he wasn't there and he wasn't capable of imagining that something different took place in his absence. Therefore, he refused to do homework because no-one else had any as they had already completed it in class. There was no arguing with him ( very difficult to argue with that) even though I had texted his S.N.A. to clarify!!

It was funny though, 'cos we eventually got most of it done and then he told Teacher that he didn't complete his Geography 'cos he couldn't do it and "mum was too busy" to help! Teacher said mum will always help him if he needs it, so a very unimpressed WiiBoy responded by telling her, and his S.N.A. that he'd "sue" them!!

Oh dear!!

So in conclusion, it's great to have hope but we will never get complacent because the"A" word is always lurking in the deep waters to catch us out! However, we must continue to be brave and keep testing those waters! xx Jazzygal